Monday, March 27, 2017

I Feel Like I'm the Annoying Friend

Basically, I feel like no one wants me around.

On some level I know I am not. I am a good friend. I'm loyal, steadfast and I am the "mom" of my friend group. I'm always there to give advice, a hug or cook dinner. My door is always open and my couch is super comfy.

Despite all my good qualities, I still feel like my flaws overshadow my strengths.

I'm loud, I take up too much space and I can accidentally dominate a conversation. I put my foot in my mouth a lot and I've never quite figured out when I'm being too weird.

I feel like I embarrass the people around me. I'll straight up tell you I am not normal. I'm a little off and I am a huge fangirl, so I definitely stray into the "who's that weirdo?" category.

I know my friends like me. I mean, I hope they do, since we hang out all the time. And they come to me with important questions, so they must think I'm trust-worthy.

But I still worry I bug them or they just tolerate me. I don't know. I wish I could just hang out with people and not make myself sick with worry once we're done hanging out.